Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Chic Noir = miss cleo psychic advisor

I just knew this was going to happen. There was never an if but when in my mind.

Man arrested after ejaculating during TSA pat-downA 47 year old gay man was arrested at San Francisco International Airport after ejaculating while being patted down by a male TSA agent. Percy Cummings, an interior designer from San Francisco, is being held without bail after the alleged incident, charged with sexually assaulting a Federal agent.

According to Cummings’ partner, Sergio Armani, Cummings has “multiple piercings on his manhood” which were detected during a full body scan. As a result, Cummings was pulled aside for a pat-down. Armani stated that the unidentified TSA agent spent “an inordinate amount of time groping” Cummings, who had apparently become sexually aroused.

Cummings, who has a history of sexual dysfunction, ejaculated while the TSA agent’s hand was feeling the piercings. The TSA agent, according to several witnesses, promptly called for back up. Cummings was thrown to the ground and handcuffed.

A TSA spokesperson declined to comment on this specific case, but said that anyone ejaculating during a pat-down would be subject to arrest.

I coped this from dirty mo

So my questions are:

Since this is a naturally occurring thing, why is Percy being arrested for it?

How did the TSA officer know that Percy came? Was Percy moaning loudly? Was he splashed with Percy rocket launch of body fluids?

Did the piercings make Percy ultra sensitive?

Why is Percy's last name "Cummings" so fitting?

What did the officer think would happen if he spent such a long time playing with the man?

Why the hell did he need to feel around the piercings?