Sunday, October 24, 2010

the Chateau Turnes- the big breakfast part 2

Part 2 of 3

read part one here

The Big Breakfast

Doug alpha struts with his fresh pair of easy spirits and his silk pajams suit on looking like the chateau's very own hugh hefner out to the veranda to enjoy his breakfast at the alpha table. All the while basking in the glow of bitter beta hatraid.

*Doug hums a little ditty to himself in a Sinatra like voice*

Betas gonna hate
10's get all the dates
an alpha never waits

chrous hate on me.
hate on me
I said... hate on me.

betas always bait
10's get all the mens
alphas always win.

hate on me
hate on me
I said... hate on me.

On out to the Vernanda we see the three species of men as we know them.

At one table we have our betas. The table that seats the betas is very long. On one end you have your nice beteas like Default User, Comment Whatever,Keith,college boy,pollymath, and MQ.

*chic noir goes down the line to give each and everyone of them a hug*

On the other end of the beta table you have your mean betas.

the drink brothers, whiskey and rum who fall right in the middle of the spectrum, sit along the mid point of the table.

You would think that even with a recession and all, roissy would be decent enough to spring for a new table for the betas but no he doesn't.

The beta table is so bad that one of the legs is missing so the guys crazy glued an old mop handle where the leg should be so that the table can be somewhat leveled.

When Whiskey is in one of his brooding woo is beta moods. He's been known to slam his elbows on the table which sends eveyone's drinks and food flying.

The chairs are rather shabby as well. Their are mix match law chairs, folding chairs,run down wooden chairs full of splinters, and a few milk crates.

Well at least the betas have tables and chairs... the omegas... Oh Lord.

the Omegas sit on grass. The only thing seperating omegas from the ants and other creatures of the dirt are thin used and abused table clothes. Well, it's not like the omegas eat much. Most of them weigh 100 lbs soacking wet. The way they see it, their vegan, raw food slow cooked locally grown diet of green grass juice needs and seads makes them far healthier than any carnovoire slab of red meat eating alpha. In fact what little the omegs do eat is shared with the women that love them.

Yup those evil weevil American feminist lawyer man hating sugery drinks cankles having latte drinking shebeasts. Why if I didn't know any better I would swear we where living in the days of Romans. The bird chested omegas are gently feeding the hot breathed fem lawyer blabber mouthed emotional banshes grapes off a vine one by one while other omegas stand around to fan them with giant feathers. Kim,anon, Al ,marcus A, and the other feminists don't lift a finger cause the omegas are doing all the work for them.

Now the alpha table is a sight to behold. It's well made from marble and gold. The chairs are orginal Louis xvi which have been reupholstered and customed to fit the character of each alpha.

Well after keeping everyone waiting forever... out come the alphas. Oh what a mighty group of alphas we have here. Of course out comes the struting and so debnoire alpha doug daper #1 poon traper. Bhetti gently lays a napkin in doug's lap and smiles sweetly at doug. Behind Doug, other alphas slowly make their entrance. After all, alphas don't rush because that's what betas and omegas are for.

next up...

Uncle Mu/Obsidian who suavely peacock alpha struts to his seat.

Brown Sugar stands up after polishing the legs of Mu's chair and whispers to MU ...

"my king, you seat is ready"

*mu pops his collar, throws his nose up at the hbd betas and takes his seat*

Next out is the tall strapping handsomley Nordic looking Whellmer. With an angery scoul on his face, enough flannel to burn through the Florida Everglades, and an aggresive walk that gives him the look of an extra right out of Niverana's teen spirit video. Combined with the gentelness he shows his kids, the women are in gina tingle heaven just from Whellmers presence alone.

rebellious vanilla chants to herself " whellmer is the ideal, whellmer is the ideal, whellmer is the ideal"

A minute latter out comes Roshv with the flag of his latest score saftey-pinned to his shirt. Now Rooshv is the most petite of our alphas but don't get it twisted, he still all alpha. why he has the body hair of ten 6'5 studs.

Roosh uses the help of a step stool to climb into his alpha chair. leaning back against his booster seat, his back hair get stuck to the chair like velcro.

*anouck goes to help rooshV*

chic noir grabs anouck by the arm and says: "don't"

A few minutes later out comes VK...

Now VK ain't one to get into the flaming racewars with the trolls. In fact he will play along with some sterotypes if it means getting the woman that he wants. That's why this morning he comes out struting in a leopard print loin cloth.

pupu says:

"oh my, oh wee
VK has too much for me!"

rebellious vanilla's mouth falls open.

tupac leans in to whisper: and you gonna need to leave that badboy open to get it all in.

DA bangs his fists against the tale and wails "VK has set blk people back 200 years with this getup he has on."

nicole turns to DA " but it is better that he is not one of the shepple. He has his own mind and is an independant thinker. "In every real man a child is hidden that wants to play. "

sofia yells "Friedrich Nietzsche"

a bitter beta utters " I hate smart women"

Whiskey takes note of the way the women of the chateu behave after seeing VK and says "I knew it I knew it I knew it. There is no hope for us wonder bread betas"

A few minutes later here comes Rose. Holding his arms at a 90 degree angle that is congruent with his hips, nose slighlty turned upwards cause that's the most alpha way to approach a crowd according to a study done by the untied states federation of phycatrists who live and breath to study female 10's.

next comes Dragnet. Uttering wise words that all the betas listen to in a transfixed state and shake their heads in agreement with.

An Ferdinand comes out fussing,cussing and yelling about the nerds in club sigmode. Itwas movie night, they keep Ferdinand up all night while watching Return Of The NAMS.

Ferdinand "I swear, I hate nerds with everything in my soul." " I can't stand them, herd like creatures."

1std mumbles under his breath " better than NAMS"

Ferdinand turns to 1stdv rips off her shirt and yells "What was that nerd boy?"

*maurice the diplomat comes over to calm Ferdinand*

maurice "now ferdinand, everyone knows you can't stand nerds but give the guys a break."

*Ferdinand takes Maurices advice and has a seat*

*SD winks at Maurice*

Rickyraw aka T comes staggering out. T is on day 21 of his 30 day of alpha fast and he's feeling very weak. Looks over at some beta who paid 300 bucks for a pair of pre washed worn denim and clucks his tongue.

PA comes out alpha struting t with a set of HB10 PA style Eastern European twins, one on each arm.They're know as Hello&Good bye around the chateau. Why Hello&Goodbye? ??

Cause their chests and bottoms are so flat, you can tell if they're coming or going.

Just as the alphas are seated and begin to greet one another, the most alpha of them all prepares to make his entrance.

epoxy sofine pauses on the thresshold of door to turn to listen to lilgrl who slaps him on the butt and whispers in his ear "go make me proud baby".

With that epoxy is off.

Epoxy alpha struts across the thresshold like a man on top of the world. Clears his throat and everyone stops to stare. Alphas, beatas,omega, young and old, female lawyer beasts , sweet natured libarians, 10s and 2s. Aged 8 to 80 deff, dumb ,blind, and crazy.

A group of white dolves who were making a nest, see epoxy and imediatly abandonned their task. The dooves swooped down to sing to epoxy "It's raining men".

behind the doves, sexy perodactyl comes flying over the crowd.

*chic noir thinks to self*

" wow, that's got to be a sign something bad about to happen"

*whiskey looks up with mouth open*

sexy perodactyl lets it ripe

*chic noir hands whiskey a tissue from inside her bra &returns attention back to epoxy*

epoxy rips off his shirt

*chic noir dead faints*

The nice betas and omegas imagine what life would be life if only they looked like epoxy. While the bitter betas hate saying things like:

He can't be str8.

STr8 men aren't born that good-looking.

He got a nose job, calf implants, peck implants and a brain implant.

chic noir says to self " that lil grl sure is one lucky woman"

desi mumbles to self " he ain't all that, for one thing his mother probably...."

chic noir to desi" hush desi, don't mess up a fantasy"

The alphas look at epoxy and mumble to themselves "yea he's goodlooking, but I got game"

lil grl comes walks out to the mumbles of a choirs of angry bitter betas.

"she isn't all that" "I've seen beter" " did I tell you about that 10 I met in Taiwan, lil grl ain't nothing compared to her" " she was suppose to be ours" " I can't stand that lil grl" "she to arrogant" " I just angry cause she didn't want my pott bellied baulding, smelly body"

When what comes out, the betas mumble now that's a proper girl. what winks at morselex,morselex blows a kiss. the two then sneak off where no one can find them.

Two minutes later, food is brought out and the alphas eat first. Great big cuts of meat, most of which Dave from Hawaii caught earlier in the morning. Endless gobblets of the finest red Italian wine whose grapes were smashed by the hottest 10s in Italy is brought out for the alphas to drink.


The betas wait for a glass a water.

Just then.... A load sound of thunder roars overhead. everyone looks up.

Stay tunned for the next episode.